'When is it going to stop?' Rihanna gives details on assault

Really graphic and honestly... just sad details are coming out today from Rihanna's extensive interview on ABC with Diane Sawyer, which has ABC has been leaking in bits and pieces over the last two days.

She told Sawyer:

"It wasn't the same person that says I love you. It was not those... eyes. He had ... no soul in his eyes. Just blank. ...He was clearly blacked out. There was no person when I looked at him."

"All I kept thinking all the time: When is it going to stop? When it is going to stop?"

She also shot down the loose talk that it was anything like a fight in the Lamborghini that night - it was a beatdown.


"I fended him off with my feet from one ... side of the car, but ... it was not like, it was not like a fight with each other. I just ... I really just wanted it to stop," she said.

What we find really compelling and tragic are her comments on how their relationship became and why she went back to him. It's that first love tabanca...

"To fall in love with your best friend it ... can be scary because the ... the emotions get really, they get the best of you. Like it takes over. The more in love we became, the more dangerous we became for each other, equally as dangerous."

She said that in the aftermath of the incident, her celebrity (notoriety?) meant that she was cut off and lonely and that was when thoughts started to creep in that she needed to 'protect' Brown.

"You start lying to yourself. ... This is a memory you don't want to have ever again. ... the physical wounds go away, you put it in the back of your head and you start lying to yourself subconsciously. "I felt very lonely. ...I couldn't even go back to my own house because there were 200 people outside with cameras, paparazzi, journalists, fans, neighbors."

"This is why I made my decision. ...I felt really lonely. ...There were times when I cried. There were times when I just sat there all day and watched TV.

If I feel this depressed, then what is he going through? I had to protect him. I thought that I had to let him know, don't do anything crazy. Like just hang in there...The whole world hates him now. His fans, his career. He just, he lost me, I just need to let him know; don't do anything stupid ...I'm not saying that's an excuse for me to go back, but this is what I was thinking about."

She also revealed that even when they got back together, she tried to spare his feelings.

"I just said to him, 'I can't do this.' I resented him. I resented him so much. And I always put the tough face on and try to, I can do anything face, and just try to play it off. But he knew. He knew it. He kept asking me, 'You hate me, don't you? You hate me. And I would lie and I would say, 'No, no. And ... I did hate him. ... Everything about him annoyed me. So finally ... I just said, we can't ... we can't do this. I cannot continue to do this."

Which makes perfect sense ... in the dysfunctional world of abusive relationships and is what we said the other day when we commented on her Glamour mag interview. As upside down and backward as it seems, often the abuser ends up seeming like the vulnerable one because they are often so torn up with remorse and self-loathing after the incident, that they seem like the weaker one, the one who needs to be comforted and held up.

Shoot, even we feel sorry for Chris reading the excerpts from his interview with MTV's Sway.

'Why did it happen?' Like, 'What was I thinking? What is wrong with you?' That's what I'm thinking with myself," he told Sway.

It gets you even more when you read about how panic-stricken he was leading up to his highly anticipated and then widely panned interview with Larry King.

"I was so nervous. I was super nervous. I didn't know what to think [going in].  'Man, I'm going to get on here, and they're going to chew me up and everybody is just going to go in on me.' So I was more scared than anything.

"[There's] really not too much preparing you can do. I did a lot of media training and a lot of stuff like that, and it kind of wasn't genuine to me. Everything I was saying was from my heart, but it was kind of controlled. 'Well, don't say it like this, because it will look like that.' "

Poor kids. This is just not a straightforward situation, though many stans on both sides would like it to be. I will never condone what Chris did and I will always defend my islandistas but I do feel bad for both of them.

First love... it ent nothing easy. I don't know anyone that let go of their first love easily. Because you have never loved like that before, you think you are never going to love like that again. So you hold on even when you shouldn't.

Moreover, to go through your first love and the breakdown of your first love in public has to be incredibly difficult, particularly (and we think this is key) when neither of them came from particularly stable family backgrounds. Chris' mother was abused and Rihanna's father was on drugs. You put together the children of two such dysfunctional upbringings together with little adult supervision, in front of the whole world and with lots of money... and it's their first love and they ent really know how this true love thing does work?

Sigh...

Post Title

→

'When is it going to stop?' Rihanna gives details on assault

Post URL

→

https://nickiminaj-tdr.blogspot.com/2009/11/is-it-going-to-stop-rihanna-gives.html

Visit nicki minaj for Daily Updated Wedding Dresses Collection

Rihanna speaks out

Rihanna has finally spoken out about her feelings about what went down earlier this year after she was beaten by her ex(?) boyfriend Chris Brown on the morning of the Grammy Awards.

She did an interview with Glamour magazine, which is set to come in their December issue - they dropped a preview of it today (no doubt to beat out ABC).

A few of the snippets:

On the photo of her being leaked.

It was humiliating; that is not a photo you would show to anybody. I felt completely taken advantage of. I felt like people were making it into a fun topic on the Internet, and it’s my life. I was disappointed, especially when I found out the photo was [supposedly leaked by] two women.

On the chaos immediately afterwards:

It has taught me so much. I felt like I went to sleep as Rihanna and woke up as Britney Spears. That was the level of media chaos that happened the next day. It was like, What, there are helicopters circling my house? There are 100 people in my cul-de-sac? What do you mean, I can’t go back home?

On what she wants her message to other young women suffering from domestic violence to be:

Domestic violence is a big secret. No kid goes around and lets people know their parents fight. Teenage girls can’t tell their parents that their boyfriend beat them up. You don’t dare let your neighbor know that you fight. It’s one of the things we [women] will hide, because it’s embarrassing. My story was broadcast all over the world for people to see, and they have followed every step of my recovery.

Our take on this?

We're glad she spoke. We really hope against hope that she is not being pressured to do so just to pub her album. That would be the rankest exploitation.

We know a lot of the ignorant commenters out there would like domestic violence to be a black or white issue, so they can justify their hatred/jealousy of Rihanna.


But the truth is domestic violence is not nearly as straightforward, black and white or by the rules as is portrayed on tv.

It is not simply a matter of an evil, evil man beating the crap out of his woman because he is evil through and through.

It is not always a case where the woman does not fight back and is just helplessly beaten to a pulp. A relationship where domestic violence has intervened is dysfunctional - on both sides. There can be violence from both sides. That does not make it any better when a man uses the advantage of his size to beat up on a woman. To quote Uncle Ben from Spiderman "with great power cames great responsibility" - that refers to physical power as well super-spidey powers. :)

It is the whole thing of the hammer and the fly. If a fly lights on you and is buzzing around you, do you respond by smashing it with a hammer?

Same thing with Chris Brown and Rihanna. It was reported in court that she had slapped him before. Does a slap from a woman equate to or merit being punched, kicked, slammed and bitten by a man who is about 60 to 80 pounds heavier and 4 or 5 inches taller and that much stronger?

And a lot of others will say well why did she wait so long to speak out? In this, I think her comments about the embarassment and humiliation are pretty telling - for surely it is a confusing, humiliating experience to go through - especially in front of the whole world.

A victim of domestic violence (which Rihanna is, no matter what you say) does not automatically snap out of it right away and realise she must leave her abuser. It is dysfunctional and this dysfunctionality often plays out by the woman staying with the man.

A victim of domestic violence does not automatically stop loving the man just because he hit her, kicked her, shot her, stomped on her. The love is still there.

And most importantly, because of all these conflicting feelings and dysfunctionality, it is not always easy for DV victim to speak out right away. It is embarrassing and humiliating to feel these things, to still be in love with someone who hurts you, to fear someone and yet love them.

Frankly, nine months is hardly any time at all. Tina Turner left Ike in 1976 and it took TEN YEARS before she told her story in I, Tina.

So Rihanna can take all the time she wants, IMO.

Post Title

→

Rihanna speaks out

Post URL

→

https://nickiminaj-tdr.blogspot.com/2009/11/rihanna-speaks-out.html

Visit nicki minaj for Daily Updated Wedding Dresses Collection

Chrihanna pre-Grammy bust up?

Update #2: Our sources are reporting that Rihanna has only just left the hospital a short while ago, after spending much of the day there. Chris is also reportedly on his way out... of the police station that is, after posting $50,000 bail.

Update #1:

Reports are that Chris Brown has turned himself into the LAPD, after being prepped for the last few hours by his lawyers. Good thing too - he had until midnight to turn himself in or else, as LAPD's Officer Harding put it "if Police locate Brown, he's subject to arrest". In other words, they were going to be on his tail.

Meanwhile, the stories of what went down are coming out fast and furious. Our sources say that apparently Chris was being 'overly social' at Clive Davis' pre-Grammy party which he and Rihanna attended together and that did not go down well with her. They got into a big argument about it on their way 'home' and he choked her. The ybf.com has it that he punched her in the face. Either way, she's reportedly recovering in the hospital.

Damn. Our original report is below.

------

Wuhloss... pepper sauce!

Word is filtering out that Chris Brown (aka Rihanna's boo) is under investigation for domestic violence felony battery, stemming from an incident in the wee hours of this morning, after he left Clive Davis' legendary Grammy pre-party, which he attended with Rihanna, as you can see below.



The LAPD confirmed the reports but have said they will not be releasing the name of the victim, with spokesperson Officer April Harding saying:

"Any victim who's involved in a domestic violence incident is entitled to confidentiality."

According to people.com:

 Around 12:30 a.m. on Sunday, the R&B singer and a woman were in a vehicle in L.A. when they became involved in an argument, according to a police statement. After stopping his car, Brown and the woman got out and the argument escalated. The woman suffered visible injuries and identified Brown as her attacker, according to police.


The LAPD received a 911 call reporting the disturbance. "If police locate Brown, yes, he's subject to arrest," Officer Harding added.

When officers arrived they found the victim, but Brown had already left the scene, the statement reads.

 Hmm... and it gets more and more suss. Just a short while ago, a statement was released saying that Rihanna, who was scheduled to perform at the Grammys tonight, will NOT be performing after all.

We have just been informed that Rihanna will not be attending tonight's 51st Annual GRAMMY Awards. We're sorry she is unable to join us this evening."


 In addition, E! the entertainment station just confirmed that Chris won't be performing either.

Eh-heh. Are we surprised? Not really. In a little place like Bim... heck the Caribbean, word gets around fast and ever since Chrihanna's trip here last summer, rumours were circulating about the ... tempestuous nature of these kids' relationship and of their major bust-ups including throwing and damaging each other's stuff.

Looks like it may not have been just rumours after all. Tsk ... there are no prizes for being the new Bobby and Whitney, kids.

Post Title

→

Chrihanna pre-Grammy bust up?

Post URL

→

https://nickiminaj-tdr.blogspot.com/2009/02/chrihanna-pre-grammy-bust-up.html

Visit nicki minaj for Daily Updated Wedding Dresses Collection

Remember where you came from...

We quite liked these pics snapped of Rihanna as she puttered about LA preparing for the Grammies this Sunday.
[/caption]

We love it not just because of the fab looks on both girls - though we do love the floaty white skirt and quirky touch of the pearls on Rihanna and the plaid shirt in Barbados' national colours on her best friend Melissa.

But the obvious genuine friendship and camraderie evident is good to see. Often celebs end up surrounded by fake friends who can be their downfall. But Rihanna has clearly decided that the small matter of a few thousand miles of sea and land (Melissa studies in Trinidad) is not going to keep her from her real friends and you see Mel around so often, you would be forgiven for thinking she lives in the States.

It brings to mind a comment Rihanna made to men's magazine Complex in 2007 about how she keeps grounded amidst the madness of the entertainment biz.

I'm just not that type to get sucked into bullshit. Everyone has control over what they do as an individual. I'm very sure about who I am as a person and what I'm here to do. I'm here in LA but I am still not here in LA. I come from a very different place and it gives me an advantage.

Good on her.

In other news, LisaRaye McCoy-Misick is still talking... and talking... and talking to essence.com about her two-year marriage to the premier of Turks and Caicos, Michael Misick. And it is pure hilarity, commess, and pappy-show-ness.



On their jet-setting lifestyle:

ESSENCE.com: What sort of things were you interrogated about?

LISARAYE: Our lifestyle. Like, how many times we rented a jet before we purchased our own jet. I told them to my recollection he bought me a jet and we never leased one. Actually, I was going to refurbish the entire jet, which I flew back and forth to Los Angeles in, by adding the family crest in the carpet and some flat screen televisions, and I wouldn't have done that if I was leasing. Also, our credit card and bank statements were examined to figure out where certain monies were coming from, and I signed a loan document for $6 million that I thought was for a house we were building in Los Angeles.ESSENCE.COM: Why would you allow yourself to be placed in the dark on such important personal affairs?
LISARAYE: I don't expect the readers to understand this lifestyle. This lifestyle that I married into was even new for me and on some other level. Things are done differently on this level, so if you have never been there, you can't imagine, because some things just can't be taught. When you are dating or married to a man of Michael's magnitude, you're not sitting there paying the water and electric bills. You have business accountants handle that.


Woman, please. Spare us, do cos yuh talking blasted shite. We got to call a spade a spade. NO PM, Premier or President in de Caribbean ent ballin' like dat. All in T&T, Manning try to ease and lease a private jet through BWEE and people fall in he tail cos they say Trinidad can't afford it. So if big-able T&T that got oil money fuh days can't afford it, how in de hell the premier... not even Prime Minister! of TCI gine afford it? Stuuuupssssssse... And she talking bout how de lifestyle was "on some other level". For damn sure cos it was mock like a $21 bill!

If you can stomach it, the rest of the interview is over on essence.com. In four parts no less - serialising like it is a damn soap opera. Fadda...

Post Title

→

Remember where you came from...

Post URL

→

https://nickiminaj-tdr.blogspot.com/2009/02/remember-where-you-came-from.html

Visit nicki minaj for Daily Updated Wedding Dresses Collection

3 Grammy noms for Rihanna plus so much more...

We're just bursting full of news and suss for you today islandistas... might take two posts to get it all in!

First to the good news. Islandista Rihanna has been nominated for three Grammy awards. In a star-studded nomination ceremony/concert held during prime time last night, she picked up nominations for Best Dance Recording for Disturbia, Best Pop Collaboration with Vocals for If I Never See Your Face Again and a video category (clueless me, I didn't even know the Grammies had vid categories) for Best Long Form Music Video for Good Girl Gone Bad Live. So there... who says Rihanna can't perform live?

Well... we have after seeing some of her performances in the past... but the Recording Academy disagrees.

Now to some (kinda) bad news - Rihanna and her boyfriend Chris Brown are being sued by a paparazzo Luis Santana, who was allegedly roughed up by their bodyguards in St Petersburg, Florida, a few weeks back. He's suing both of them, plus the nightclub it happened outside of. He says the heavies roughed him up and smashed his camera and he's suing them for $1 million. Ouch... the pics he posted of his bruises look pretty painful too...

[caption id="attachment_421" align="aligncenter" width="354" caption="photo credit: theybf.com"][/caption]

In some good news, top designers are falling all over themselves to produce a dress for US First Lady Michelle Obama. We have seen them and many are simply gorrrrgeous!

We especially love the sketches by Diane von Fustenberg, Christian Lacroix and Badgley Mischka. You can see all the sketches here at Women's Wear Daily.

[caption id="attachment_422" align="aligncenter" width="361" caption="DVF"][/caption]


 








[caption id="attachment_426" align="aligncenter" width="361" caption="Christian Lacroix"][/caption]










[caption id="attachment_424" align="alignnone" width="361" caption="Badgley Mischka"][/caption]

And in suss... folks have been asking what these Jamaican entertainers really about though, since Elephant Man's performance in Barbados a few weeks back. It's one thing to be a tight-pants sporting, pointy-shoe wearing, hair-dyed character. You can argue that it part of the persona. However it is pretty incongruous with all the rampany homophobia that Jamaican artistes like Ele love to spew - which he did of course, at the event.

But it is reaaaaally funny when this same homosexual-bashing artiste RUNS a set of cute female dancers off of the stage -not once, but twice! And then to make matters more interesting, he calls up a set of skinny-pants wearing yutes from down in the crowd to come on stage with him and then he big dem up straight and is really, really into dancing with them.


What Ele really going on with? How you acting so homophobic and then you run cute girls and bring up a set of men around you? Me thinks he (and other JA dancehall artistes) doth protest too much... how ironic!

Post Title

→

3 Grammy noms for Rihanna plus so much more...

Post URL

→

https://nickiminaj-tdr.blogspot.com/2008/12/3-grammy-noms-for-rihanna-plus-so-much.html

Visit nicki minaj for Daily Updated Wedding Dresses Collection